| Recorded at | August 01, 2021 |
|---|---|
| Event | TEDMonterey |
| Duration (min:sec) | 09:06 |
| Video Type | TED Stage Talk |
| Words per minute | 197.69 fast |
| Readability (FK) | 69.73 very easy |
| Speaker | Jennifer Aaker and Naomi Bagdonas |
Official TED page for this talk
Synopsis
There's a mistaken belief in today's working world that leaders need to be serious all the time to be taken seriously. The research tells a different story. Based on the course they teach at Stanford's Graduate School of Business, behavioral scientist Jennifer Aaker and corporate strategist Naomi Bagdonas delve into the surprising power of humor: why it's a secret weapon to build bonds, power, creativity and resilience -- and how we can all have more of it.
| 1 | 00:04 | Naomi Bagdonas: Alright, so, how often do you laugh at work? | ||
| 2 | 00:08 | I mean really laugh. | ||
| 3 | 00:12 | We asked some of you this question, and here's what we heard. | ||
| 4 | 00:17 | "Rarely." | ||
| 5 | 00:18 | "Seldomly." | ||
| 6 | 00:20 | And then our personal favorite ... | ||
| 7 | 00:22 | (Laughter) | ||
| 8 | 00:25 | "I study climate change. Why would I laugh?" | ||
| 9 | 00:28 | The two of us teach a class at Stanford Business School | ||
| 10 | 00:30 | about the power of humor in leadership. | ||
| 11 | 00:33 | Jennifer Aaker: Turns out that humor is a teachable skill, | ||
| 12 | 00:36 | and one of the most underappreciated assets at work. | ||
| 13 | 00:40 | For the record, | ||
| 14 | 00:41 | our class on humor gets the same academic credit | ||
| 15 | 00:45 | as financial accounting, | ||
| 16 | 00:47 | NB: ... which is not a joke. | ||
| 17 | 00:48 | JA: Here is the problem, though. | ||
| 18 | 00:50 | We've all fallen off a humor cliff. | ||
| 19 | 00:53 | In a global study, | ||
| 20 | 00:54 | over a million people were asked a simple question: | ||
| 21 | 00:57 | "Did you smile or laugh a lot, yesterday?" | ||
| 22 | 01:00 | When we are kids, the answer is "yes." | ||
| 23 | 01:03 | Then, right when we enter the workforce, | ||
| 24 | 01:05 | the answer becomes "no." | ||
| 25 | 01:08 | The good news is things look up again | ||
| 26 | 01:11 | around 80. | ||
| 27 | 01:12 | (Laughter) | ||
| 28 | 01:16 | The bad news is the average life expectancy is 78. | ||
| 29 | 01:20 | So ... | ||
| 30 | 01:21 | (Laughter) | ||
| 31 | 01:22 | JA: It's not good NB: It's not great. | ||
| 32 | 01:24 | JA: I’m a behavioral scientist | ||
| 33 | 01:25 | who spent my career studying what actually creates happiness in life | ||
| 34 | 01:29 | versus what we think. | ||
| 35 | 01:30 | NB: And I'm a corporate strategist | ||
| 36 | 01:32 | who spent my career straddling the worlds of business and improv comedy. | ||
| 37 | 01:36 | Which was a wide straddle. | ||
| 38 | 01:38 | The two of us are on a mission to bring humor back. | ||
| 39 | 01:41 | Over the last decade, we have gathered data, | ||
| 40 | 01:43 | partnered with comedians | ||
| 41 | 01:45 | and talked to leaders about humor. | ||
| 42 | 01:47 | One of them was our friend Connor Diemand-Yauman. | ||
| 43 | 01:50 | Connor is the co-CEO of a large nonprofit, | ||
| 44 | 01:52 | and in early 2020, just weeks after the world went into quarantine, | ||
| 45 | 01:57 | he's leading his first virtual offsite with his entire organization. | ||
| 46 | 02:01 | People are exhausted and scared, it's tense. | ||
| 47 | 02:05 | So Connor shares a few slides | ||
| 48 | 02:08 | before passing to another teammate to speak. | ||
| 49 | 02:10 | But when he does, he intentionally leaves his screen-share on, | ||
| 50 | 02:15 | so his entire organization watches, thinking that this is a terrible mistake. | ||
| 51 | 02:20 | As Connor closes his PowerPoint, | ||
| 52 | 02:22 | opens up a Google search, and types in ... this. | ||
| 53 | 02:26 | [Things inspirational CEOs say during hard times] | ||
| 54 | 02:29 | (Laughter) | ||
| 55 | 02:31 | "Things inspirational CEOs say during hard times." | ||
| 56 | 02:34 | (Laughter) | ||
| 57 | 02:36 | Everyone laughs. | ||
| 58 | 02:38 | It's this beautiful moment of levity, | ||
| 59 | 02:40 | and it has real upside for Connor and for his organization, | ||
| 60 | 02:44 | because we know from the research | ||
| 61 | 02:45 | that leaders with a good sense of humor are seen as 27 percent more motivating. | ||
| 62 | 02:49 | Their teams are more bonded and creative. | ||
| 63 | 02:52 | JA: Also, humor sells. | ||
| 64 | 02:55 | Studies show that adding a lighthearted line into a sales pitch, | ||
| 65 | 02:59 | like "My final offer is x ... | ||
| 66 | 03:01 | And I'll throw in my pet frog," | ||
| 67 | 03:03 | makes people willing to pay nearly 20 percent more. | ||
| 68 | 03:08 | Really let it sink in, | ||
| 69 | 03:10 | just how bad that joke is. | ||
| 70 | 03:12 | (Laughter) | ||
| 71 | 03:14 | NB: "I'll throw in my pet frog." | ||
| 72 | 03:15 | JA: The bar is so low. NB: It's extreme. | ||
| 73 | 03:18 | (Laughter) | ||
| 74 | 03:19 | NB: Very low. JA: Could not be lower. | ||
| 75 | 03:21 | (Laughter) | ||
| 76 | 03:23 | JA: Laughter shortens the path to connection as well. | ||
| 77 | 03:26 | So when strangers share a laugh before a conversation, | ||
| 78 | 03:29 | they end up disclosing more personal information, | ||
| 79 | 03:32 | so they feel closer. | ||
| 80 | 03:34 | You really laughed hard at that "pet frog" line. | ||
| 81 | 03:37 | I already feel close to you. | ||
| 82 | 03:39 | Don’t we feel close? | ||
| 83 | 03:40 | JA: Yeah, we feel close. | ||
| 84 | 03:41 | NB: There's a lot there. | ||
| 85 | 03:43 | NB: OK, so what's happening is when we laugh, | ||
| 86 | 03:45 | our brains release a cocktail of hormones. | ||
| 87 | 03:48 | So we release endorphins, | ||
| 88 | 03:50 | giving us a similar feeling to a runner’s high; | ||
| 89 | 03:52 | we lower our cortisol, making us feel calmer; | ||
| 90 | 03:55 | and we release dopamine, the same hormone released during sex, | ||
| 91 | 03:58 | making us feel more bonded. | ||
| 92 | 04:00 | So in essence, | ||
| 93 | 04:01 | as far as our brains are concerned, | ||
| 94 | 04:03 | laughing is like exercising, meditating and having sex at the same time. | ||
| 95 | 04:09 | (Laughter) | ||
| 96 | 04:10 | But logistically easier. | ||
| 97 | 04:11 | JA: Also, efficient. NB: Yes. | ||
| 98 | 04:14 | NB: There's a lot to it. | ||
| 99 | 04:15 | Alright, so humor works. | ||
| 100 | 04:18 | And the really good news that we want to talk about today | ||
| 101 | 04:21 | is that this humor cliff is actually easy to fix. | ||
| 102 | 04:24 | [GLOBAL HUMOR CLIFF] | ||
| 103 | 04:25 | (Laughter) | ||
| 104 | 04:27 | Isn’t that better? 10 years, but we got there. | ||
| 105 | 04:31 | Just a little Sharpie. | ||
| 106 | 04:32 | OK, the actual good news is that our lives are full of humor, | ||
| 107 | 04:36 | if we know how to look for it. | ||
| 108 | 04:38 | JA: Here's the secret. | ||
| 109 | 04:39 | Don't look for what's funny, just notice what's true. | ||
| 110 | 04:43 | We asked some of you what's true in your own lives, | ||
| 111 | 04:46 | and here's a few things we heard. | ||
| 112 | 04:48 | NB: "Since working from home, I only comb the front part of my hair." | ||
| 113 | 04:51 | (Laughter) | ||
| 114 | 04:54 | JA: "I only like my own kids ..." | ||
| 115 | 04:56 | (Laughter) | ||
| 116 | 04:57 | “There, I said it.” | ||
| 117 | 04:58 | NB: So this is not about becoming a comedian. | ||
| 118 | 05:01 | This is about looking at the world in a different way. | ||
| 119 | 05:03 | There's a psychological principle called the priming effect | ||
| 120 | 05:06 | that says our brains are wired to see what we've been set up to expect. | ||
| 121 | 05:11 | In essence, we find what we choose to look for. | ||
| 122 | 05:14 | So when we live our lives on the precipice of a smile, | ||
| 123 | 05:17 | we shift how we interact with the world, | ||
| 124 | 05:19 | and in turn, how it interacts back. | ||
| 125 | 05:21 | JA: It's also about being human, | ||
| 126 | 05:23 | which should be easy, because we are human. | ||
| 127 | 05:27 | But at work, it's oftentimes harder than we think. | ||
| 128 | 05:30 | In a recent survey, people were asked "What traits inspire trust in a leader?" | ||
| 129 | 05:36 | One of the top responses: "Speaks like a regular person." | ||
| 130 | 05:40 | When work gets serious and life gets busy, | ||
| 131 | 05:42 | we become transactional. | ||
| 132 | 05:44 | And yet these small shifts are enough | ||
| 133 | 05:46 | to move us from transactional to human. | ||
| 134 | 05:49 | As small as a single word, | ||
| 135 | 05:51 | like how we often sign off our emails: “Best.” | ||
| 136 | 05:55 | What does "best" even mean? | ||
| 137 | 05:56 | Are you the best? Am I the best? | ||
| 138 | 05:59 | Why do I need to tell you that? | ||
| 139 | 06:01 | We can do better than "best." | ||
| 140 | 06:03 | Instead, how about ... | ||
| 141 | 06:05 | NB: When you've been up all night -- | ||
| 142 | 06:07 | "Yours heavily caffeinated." | ||
| 143 | 06:08 | (Laughter) | ||
| 144 | 06:09 | JA: When you're talking about financial accounting? | ||
| 145 | 06:12 | "Let's never speak of this again." | ||
| 146 | 06:14 | NB: And on rare occasion, "I'm the best." | ||
| 147 | 06:17 | (Laughter) | ||
| 148 | 06:18 | Sometimes, you've just got to let people know. | ||
| 149 | 06:21 | Now, it's easy to believe | ||
| 150 | 06:23 | that if we take our lives or our mission seriously, | ||
| 151 | 06:26 | the presence of humor betrays that mission. | ||
| 152 | 06:28 | That gravity and levity are somehow at odds. | ||
| 153 | 06:31 | But our research tells a different story. | ||
| 154 | 06:33 | JA: We met with Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, | ||
| 155 | 06:36 | who told us of the time when the Russian government | ||
| 156 | 06:39 | had bugged the US State Department, | ||
| 157 | 06:41 | a serious breach in international diplomacy. | ||
| 158 | 06:44 | After learning about the bugging, | ||
| 159 | 06:46 | Secretary Albright then went to her next meeting | ||
| 160 | 06:50 | with the Russian foreign minister, | ||
| 161 | 06:52 | wearing a bug pin. | ||
| 162 | 06:53 | (Laughter) | ||
| 163 | 06:55 | And enormous bug pin. | ||
| 164 | 06:57 | (Laughter) | ||
| 165 | 07:05 | She shared how the foreign minister couldn't help but smile, | ||
| 166 | 07:09 | and she also shared how the energy in the room shifted, | ||
| 167 | 07:11 | and it changed the conversation entirely. | ||
| 168 | 07:15 | NB: This story illuminates at least two things that are true. | ||
| 169 | 07:18 | First, that humor is a choice, | ||
| 170 | 07:21 | one we make in small moments and in big ones, too. | ||
| 171 | 07:24 | And second, that the balance of gravity and levity | ||
| 172 | 07:27 | gives power to both. | ||
| 173 | 07:28 | We can do serious things without taking ourselves so seriously, | ||
| 174 | 07:32 | and in fact, often, we can do them better, | ||
| 175 | 07:35 | and more fashionably. | ||
| 176 | 07:37 | JA: Now we often hear that humor can be so tricky these days, | ||
| 177 | 07:40 | and it's true. | ||
| 178 | 07:41 | Comedians know this, | ||
| 179 | 07:43 | which is why they can practice hundreds of times | ||
| 180 | 07:45 | before a line makes it into one of their sets. | ||
| 181 | 07:48 | They also get to wear jeans and drink whiskey at work. | ||
| 182 | 07:50 | It's all very unfair. | ||
| 183 | 07:52 | So how can we, as normal, non-comedian people, | ||
| 184 | 07:56 | practice safe sets? | ||
| 185 | 07:58 | Start by recognizing it's not about you. | ||
| 186 | 08:01 | So don't ask "Will this make me sound funny?" | ||
| 187 | 08:04 | Instead, ask: “How will this make other people feel?” | ||
| 188 | 08:08 | NB: Which also means never punching down, | ||
| 189 | 08:10 | that is, making fun of someone of lower status. | ||
| 190 | 08:13 | And be sure to check your distance. | ||
| 191 | 08:15 | How close are you personally to what you're making light of? | ||
| 192 | 08:18 | I can make fun of my mother, but not your mother, | ||
| 193 | 08:21 | who, by the way, I hear is a saint, a lovely lady. | ||
| 194 | 08:25 | JA: An angel. | ||
| 195 | 08:27 | NB: Our hope today is that you start climbing back up the humor cliff. | ||
| 196 | 08:31 | Start with what's true, and start small. | ||
| 197 | 08:34 | Choose to live on the precipice of a smile. | ||
| 198 | 08:37 | When we do, we create teams, communities and families | ||
| 199 | 08:40 | where joy and laughter come more easily. | ||
| 200 | 08:43 | JA: Laughing together makes us feel more connected. | ||
| 201 | 08:46 | It floods our brains | ||
| 202 | 08:47 | with the same hormones associated with love. | ||
| 203 | 08:50 | And who doesn't want to feel more joy and love in our lives? | ||
| 204 | 08:54 | Where humor exists, love is not far behind. | ||
| 205 | 08:58 | NB: And if that doesn't sell you on the power of humor, | ||
| 206 | 09:01 | I will throw in my pet frog. | ||
| 207 | 09:02 | (Laughter) | ||
| 208 | 09:05 | NB: Thank you. JA: Thank you so much. | ||
| 209 | 09:06 | (Applause) |